I should be more sad, but I'm not. I get to see Wolfwood again. It isn't miserable here. [she knows that's selfish! but lambda said she could be, so she's gonna. she also doesn't really care about the other three, or - like, she does, but it's much more distant than her feelings about her teammate.] I'd like to know who killed him.
[her nose wrinkles just a little at that, but - yeah, they weren't ever really in the running, not after froggy and justice did 65 kills, so she's not going to complain...
if gerard hadn't killed her maybe she would've been able to do a murder and get them ahead!! alas.]
We sent a lot of messages to protect the top two teams, so I suppose there should be some alliances there. [...] I have no idea. I've been dead for so long that it's hard to know what anybody is thinking.
[there's a pause, because she agrees with this, and she's trying to think of how to be nice about it and then she just gives up because who gives a fuck. niceness is something she's only just really learned here.]
I have had to be much less angry than I have wanted to be about dying because of the general love for Froggystyle. But I'm not unused to it. My feelings are often inconvenient to most people.
[she does like all of them, and she knows that points are important, but it still hurts.]
Well, you're welcome to be as angry as you want about it with me. Hell, if they hadn't done what they did to you, neither of us would've ended up in this position.
I had wondered if I'd lost my mind, you know. Some of the dead told it was okay to be angry about my death, but... when I expressed it, they were disappointed in me.
Yeah, well, most humans are self-righteous hypocrites. They'll be these big advocates for justice—
[ ... ]
The concept, not the team. [ snort. ] Obviously.
[ imagine people not stanning froggystyle. ]
...but as soon as they or someone they like is the one in the wrong, suddenly you're the bad guy, and everything you say that doesn't line up with what they want from you is irrational.
Truly bullshit. The only ones they should be disappointed in are themselves for invalidating the feelings of someone who got forced into the role of a victim.
[ like, he doesn't give a shit about zelda's feelings, but at least he thinks she deserves to have them. ]
[she listens to all of this with the faintest smile on her face.]
Sometimes, it isn't even humans who are like this. [sometimes it's the nonhumans too. but.] I don't disagree. I don't have the energy to fight it, these days.
I don't think that I hate Gerard. But I will never forget what was taken from me.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
he waves. ]
no subject
I assume you are fine. [there's no malice or anything in this, she's fine with it.]
no subject
[ he puts his phone down on the bench beside him and stretches. ]
How are you feeling about it?
[ purely out of curiosity rather than concern, but ]
no subject
I should be more sad, but I'm not. I get to see Wolfwood again. It isn't miserable here. [she knows that's selfish! but lambda said she could be, so she's gonna. she also doesn't really care about the other three, or - like, she does, but it's much more distant than her feelings about her teammate.] I'd like to know who killed him.
But I suppose I'll know one way or another.
no subject
[ it's honestly better on this side than the other... i'm just pissed about being dead on principle. ]
Guess your team's probably out of the running for real now, unless he took some of the others down himself first.
[ but at least they all already assumed it was going that way, so it's not throwing a wrench into any plans. ]
I wonder how much cooperation there was this time.
no subject
if gerard hadn't killed her maybe she would've been able to do a murder and get them ahead!! alas.]
We sent a lot of messages to protect the top two teams, so I suppose there should be some alliances there. [...] I have no idea. I've been dead for so long that it's hard to know what anybody is thinking.
no subject
no subject
They didn't tell me, either, if that makes you feel better. Kaveh and Nahida were likely afraid I would do something drastic.
no subject
It's bullshit. We have to just take whatever they do to us because our feelings are too inconvenient.
no subject
I have had to be much less angry than I have wanted to be about dying because of the general love for Froggystyle. But I'm not unused to it. My feelings are often inconvenient to most people.
[she does like all of them, and she knows that points are important, but it still hurts.]
no subject
Well, you're welcome to be as angry as you want about it with me. Hell, if they hadn't done what they did to you, neither of us would've ended up in this position.
no subject
[she tilts her head back.]
I had wondered if I'd lost my mind, you know. Some of the dead told it was okay to be angry about my death, but... when I expressed it, they were disappointed in me.
no subject
[ ... ]
The concept, not the team. [ snort. ] Obviously.
[ imagine people not stanning froggystyle. ]
...but as soon as they or someone they like is the one in the wrong, suddenly you're the bad guy, and everything you say that doesn't line up with what they want from you is irrational.
Truly bullshit. The only ones they should be disappointed in are themselves for invalidating the feelings of someone who got forced into the role of a victim.
[ like, he doesn't give a shit about zelda's feelings, but at least he thinks she deserves to have them. ]
no subject
Sometimes, it isn't even humans who are like this. [sometimes it's the nonhumans too. but.] I don't disagree. I don't have the energy to fight it, these days.
I don't think that I hate Gerard. But I will never forget what was taken from me.