[ he goes quiet as he tries to work out exactly what his feelings are, leaning back and blowing smoke up into the air. ]
...It probably wasn't ever going to make me happy. Each person I got revenge on— it felt really good, but it wasn't like I was actually feeling joy over it. It was just... numbing. Like once they were gone, the pain and the rage I'd felt over them just kind of fell away.
[ ... ]
But I don't know if I'd be able to be happy anywhere else either, knowing I'd left things unfinished back in my world. If I'm not there to prevent them from cheating their way out of the convictions they deserve, Blaise and Patricia are just going to game the system again and go free and keep committing crimes. And then the people they killed as part of my plan will have died for nothing.
[ which he wouldn't ordinarily care about, but he feels kind of conflicted about this now... knowing knightley maybe didn't deserve what he got quite so much after all. ]
no subject
[ he goes quiet as he tries to work out exactly what his feelings are, leaning back and blowing smoke up into the air. ]
...It probably wasn't ever going to make me happy. Each person I got revenge on— it felt really good, but it wasn't like I was actually feeling joy over it. It was just... numbing. Like once they were gone, the pain and the rage I'd felt over them just kind of fell away.
[ ... ]
But I don't know if I'd be able to be happy anywhere else either, knowing I'd left things unfinished back in my world. If I'm not there to prevent them from cheating their way out of the convictions they deserve, Blaise and Patricia are just going to game the system again and go free and keep committing crimes. And then the people they killed as part of my plan will have died for nothing.
[ which he wouldn't ordinarily care about, but he feels kind of conflicted about this now... knowing knightley maybe didn't deserve what he got quite so much after all. ]